T.L.O.M.L.

None of the truest things in life - like love or faith - was arrived at by thinking. Indeed, one could almost define the things that mattered as the ones that come as sudden as thunder.

I will never forget that morning in January of 2006. It was the day of victory for the Pacman; the start of his winning streak. It was also the day I would be victorious over life and love. Finally, the stars in the universe have realigned and the cosmos has decided to deliver a gift.


It would be today that I'd meet the one that would be The One in my life. The love of my life. My Crabcake.

Soundtrack: That after all the lonely years, the searching everywhere...

It started with an anonymous text:

21 m, 5'11", gymfit, mestizo here. what's yours?

I never really paid attention to it. Why should I? It could've been a missent message. Or a prank. Worse, it may be a ploy to dish out nasty stuff from me and use these for blackmail. I've seen too many conspiracy movies. Paranoia is my life.

But as the cosmos had a grand plan, at midday, I broke out from my recluse shell and replied:

who's this?

He explained how he just randomly punched in my mobile number, that he had nothing to do, and he wanted to be friends...This exchange of text messages would culminate in a long phone call where we tried to present and validate each other's histories, seemingly a pre-requisite ritual to call ourselves "friends" ... until we got tired and felt sleepy.

* * *

I remembered my self laughing a lot...my boisterous laughter and Crabcake's distinct giggle that was pure and innocent and beautiful. It was pleasantly reassuring that this was real; he was real. We were for real no matter what.

I laid awake for hours. I couldn't sleep. I was happy. I was excited. I was hopeful. I felt magic.

* * *

A friend once sent me this SMS: "You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams."


Postscript: I still dream a lot about you, Crabcake. I do. All the time, I am awake and waiting for you to come.